Thursday, April 29, 2010

9 new post and old format

I wrote most of these entries offline due to lack of internet access. I gave up on putting the right dates in but they are in order.
xoxo
b

One of the biggest bugs and a crazy spider…

I’ve spent a lot of time in tropical places so I am somewhat used to bug crazy bugs, BUT being in a landlocked country I have now seen the biggest bug ever… it was scary.. Mrs. Miriam took care of it for me. She’s my hero.

After a wonderful night of sleep I woke up and saw the craziest spider I have ever seen. It was grey with green stripes. We made a deal… I wouldn’t come close to it and it would stay away from me.

I had my first official meeting with the KnowledgeBeat team. Mr. Lohana, Mrs. Marian, Charles and Charles. I got a high level overview of what this grassroots organization is doing here in the rural parts of Zambia. Each of the members has a specific role in the education process. I was able to introduce the Zambia team to TeachAIDS. They were very impressed and are excited to implement this tool in their educational program.

Mrs. Marian is a lovely woman and has 4 children. She treats me like one of her own even though we might be the same age. After our meetings she cooked the national food of Zambia, Nshima… it’s corn meal cooked with water to the consistency you choose. Locally you are supposed to eat it with your hands. Mrs. Marian found it funny that I was using both of my hands to control the Nshima. You are supposed to take it in your right hand and roll it into a ball and mix it with other veggies or protein. I explained that I’m really fast with chopsticks but am going to need some practice with the Nshima.

I got asked what my Itouch was… I tried to explain but it was weird. Have you ever tried to explain what they are?

Off to be early… we have a 6 hour drive in the morning to the rural area…. 3+ hours are off road and I probably should have thought about wearing a sports bra.

3:30am wake-up call… destination Zambia… “Bethany from Nairobi from please got to the courtesy counter” over the loud speaker…..

Heading to Lusaka, Zambia started out pretty normal. 3:30am wake up call for 6:20am flight. Check in for my connecting flight to Johannesburg, take little nap. Spent 3 hours in the airport waiting for my next flight to Lusaka, at the last minute I see all the people at my gate get up and start moving… good indicator that my gate has changed. I run over to the other gate, hurry up and wait to get onto the bus that takes you over the tarmac to the plane. The guy next to me has never met deodorant. I really wanted to introduce them. After waiting in the hot sun on the ladder to the plane, I’m in another line to sit in my seat 18D. I arrive at my seat to see the guy that has not met deodorant in my seat. I ask the nice male flight person what I should do. He asks the smelly guy to see his boarding card. The smelly guy gets really mad and is disgruntled, looks for his boarding card. By the time I am looking like a dummy because all the other passengers just want to sit in their assigned seats. Smelly guy’s seat is 15D…. Um helloooo… he gets really mad and starts yelling in Swiss. Apparently it’s his world and I’m just visiting…. Nice male flight person asks if I wouldn’t mind sitting in smelly guy’s seat. I agree and still look like the dumb one and slither to the seat. Nice guy next to me says hello. I say hello and my blood is still boiling from the smelly guy for now many reasons. I manage a hello and fall asleep.

Landing in Lusaka I had filled out all the VISA paperwork and was ready to wait in line. I’m waiting in the correct line and smelly guy walks right in front of my and stands there. Now I’m REALLY mad…. What is with this guy???? Another guy gets in line in front of me because apparently my dreams of becoming invisible came true. The second guy looks and me and I gave him a look that could have killed him on the spot… but let him go in front of me because that is how my day was going. I’m trying to find my ZEN place but I can’t find it… I think the vein in my forehead was probably pulsing. Finally I make it to the front of the line and wait for the nice lady to ask me a bunch of questions and pay $25 for my VISA and passport stamp. As I’m getting myself together I hear over the loud speaker “Bethany from Nairobi” please come to the courtesy desk. Nice VISA lady looks at me and says “Sweetie I think they are calling you”. I say thank you and grab my passport, run over to grab my bag and am about to run though customs because I have nothing to declare and guy with big gun stops me and asks for my baggage ticket. I fumble around and find it and run out to see a beautiful woman with a sign that says “BETHANY WILLBANKS”. I am greeted my Mrs. Marian and Mr. Loahana. They are so nice and friendly, after the day I have had it was very comforting to be greeted by them. I see a little of the city of Lusaka and hit the ATM. I’m cracking up because the choices I have are millions. I obtain 1 million Zambian Kwancha. Who feels like the bawler? With currency conversion it’s $212. Still feels funny to see million behind any ATM receipt. We run a few more errands and go to chilanga a suburb of Lusaka to the KnowledgeBeat office. Mr. Lohana says my room is like a San Francisco hotel room. Small cozy and comfortable.

Table Mountain, Down Hill Mountain Biking, and a pedicure = good day…

I have one coveted day of relaxation before I head back to the airport. I decided to go on a Table Mountain Downhill Mountain bike ride with Jeff and Downhill Adventures. This was super fun, however there was some uphill climbing involved. Amazing views of Cape Town and Robben Island.

After being in Africa for a month my toes were in some need of some love. I had a fantastic pedicure at the spa! good day

3 am flight… 18+ hours…4 airports… Kigali, Nairobi, Johannesburg, Cape Town…. Immigration 3 different countries…. And nobody knows what deodorant is…

Taken for a fool by a “porter” at Johannesburg Airport – $200 SAR (South African Rand) = about $30…stupid currency conversion to take me on a 5 minute walk to my terminal…. I am so annoyed I make him buy me a diet coke. It’s like Mexico circa 1987 all over again where I spent $30 for two braided “friendship” bracelets… What is it with me at $30????

I finally get my bag and get to the cab area and the guy tells me the fare is 250SAR. I tell him I was here 10 days ago and it was 200 SAR to get to the Westin. He tells me petrol has gone up. I am not amused. We argue a little bit and I finally have to get in because I just want to get to the hotel and have no other options. He gives me his card and tells me to call for my ride back to the airport and he will charge me 200SAR. Guess who couldn’t find his card when I was going to leave… Actually I was the dumb one… I asked the hotel how much a cab to the airport is and they told me it’s 250SAR…. Oops. I guess someone needs to give the cab driver something to tell his friends about… the little cranky Korean…

Poor kid never saw it coming… When I got to the Westin, the kid at the desk was nice but said they only have rooms available on certain floors. To have a room like the one I had 10 days ago, I would have to pay an extra 400SAR a night. This is after learning on the last visit that if you book your room via hotels.com you don’t receive Starwood points. I canceled my reservation with hotels.com and re-booked with Starwood. I could have had two new Louis Vuitton handbags for what I have spent at this place in 6 weeks… I am unhappy and want to cancel my next reservation. He “talks to the manager” and magically I have a double upgrade with access to the executive club, wine and canapés are from 5-7. So as you all know I am self-funding this year. I am trying to make my points work for me, with miles from one of my accounts, I have about a month of hotels covered for in Asia! Yea!

I decided that I would really need a massage after only 45 minutes of sleep and the long day of traveling, so I call the Westin Spa from Johannesburg and made an appointment for a massage. After my fantastic massage I head up for a glass of wine. I meet a father and son from Florida who build boats. I meet another person named Jeff. He is from Conn, went to school in Boston, was in finance in NY, and now is volunteering for a year with “MÉDECINS SANS FRONTIÈRES (MSF) (Dr’s Without Borders) in Kampala, Uganda. New buddy Jeff says he is going on a downhill mountain bike adventure in the morning down Table Mountain tomorrow and do I want to go? I ask is there uphill or just downhill? He said only downhill… I’m in!

Monday, April 26, 2010

Lunch at Momma’s (that’s what we call her) home restaurant…. A gift that brings me to tears…

One of the women from the meeting of 22 women invited us to her house later in the week. She runs a restaurant for high school children. Her son encouraged her to start this because some of the pupils live too far to go home for lunch. Within half an hour of our arriving, the house is full on uniformed teenagers bubbling with energy. A few friends stop by the house and we dine together. One of the women runs a Safari company and another is a minister. Just lovely women…. Momma presents me with a gift at the end of lunch for coming to the association the other day and coming to her home…. It’s a hand carved dark wood statue of a mother nursing an infant. It’s just beautiful.

Saturday, April 24, 2010

The actual Hotel Rwanda…. Hotel Des Mille Collines

I mentioned earlier that one of Marie and Julie's sisters stayed at the hotel during 100 days of the genocide. It’s a beautiful 4 star hotel that is under renovation. If you didn’t know what happened here, it could be any hotel in any city…. This one just happens to have a sad but hopeful history. It still overwhelms me to think this was going on when I was in my teenage angst..


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rwandan_Genocide

Friday, April 23, 2010

Crockett Family... Fabulous....

When I told my brother about my wackadoodle idea to go to Africa he says "I have a friend who lives there." Of course he does. The funnier part is he will be going to Rwanda and a few other countries this summer. Jody, his step-mother-in-law says “What’s with the Willbanks kids and Africa this year?” Haha - divine intervention.
I had a fantastic meal with the Crockett Family. What a beautiful family. They are so fun. I had a blast.
Should you want to know more about the AMAZING work Carter (my brother's friend) is doing in Rwanda… Here’s a little peak from their website…..
“Karisimbi Business Partners seeks to alleviate poverty by developing ambitious and strategically-placed Rwandan entrepreneurs. We pick up where micro-finance, business incubation and small business development models leave off. Karisimbi Business Partners builds businesses by developing the management capacity of promising mid-sized ventures with untapped potential. We aim to ensure enterprises can employ many, export often, pay taxes, build industry sectors, and establish role models for a new generation of Rwandan business leaders. This intensive work cannot be done quickly or from a distance, but requires a partnership which entails working alongside ambitious entrepreneurs for years at a time”. www.karisimbipartners.com

Thursday, April 22, 2010

Interview with the micro-finance candidates…

Interview with the micro-finance candidates…
Because of confidentiality I can’t say much about this part except I had a few interviews with our micro-finance candidates to follow up with them to see how they are doing. For me this was incredibly emotional…

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

22 women….. Genocide survivors…. Truly moving…

Julie took me to an association to run a TeachAIDS session. I met with 22 women that survived the genocide and lost family members. The women were very interested in the information. We talked for a while and I got to know each one of them a little. These women have had children, lost children, husbands and other family members and the thing that amazes me is that they show no bitterness. They shared with me how they make a living. One woman makes jewelry out of paper and rolls it up so the end results looks like colorful beads! Each one of them hugged and kissed me when we were leaving (Rwandan tradition is a kiss on the alternating cheek three times).

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Rwanda….. Land of the 1,000 hills and warm people….

I spent 7 days in Kigali, Rwanda at the home of Marie’s mother and sisters home. (My “Seeds Of Empowerment” teammate) Such warm loving women. Julie is Marie’s sister and was my personal translator and new sister during my stay. Marie’s mother was full of love and kisses….. we were lost in translation…. She doesn’t speak English and I fail to speak Kiryanrwandan… But the love was felt.

Julie runs her own restaurant at the Kigali institute of technology. Everywhere in town we go she knows someone, whether they are from her 7th day Adventist Church, family friends, cousins... etc…

I was able to meet a few of Marie’s other sisters and they were just darling… warm and full of love too. Before the genocide they family was 10… now it’s 6. One of the sisters stayed at the actual “hotel Rwanda” during the 100 days….

Something that has continued to surprise me is all over Africa… no matter where I am the people want to share something with me… it could be a hug, something to drink, a meal…. Some of them have so little but is custom to share what they have.

Monday, April 19, 2010

I made a few changes

Hey Peeps...
Just wanted to let you know that I wrote most of the blog entries offline because I don't have very much internet access in Kigali. I changed the dates around so they would be in semi chronological order :)
xoxo
b
will write about Kigali on the plane tomorrow night.

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Nairobi…. Encouraging but heartbreaking at the same time….

I just wrapped up 3 days in Nairobi, Kenya. Actually it was 2 full days and travel days. Nairobi is a busy city with over 5 million people. I stayed in the city center and the smell of exhaust fumes was everywhere. Traffic could trump the 405, 101, or H1 at any time of day. As my driver pulled up to the hotel, the guards checked the trunk and under the car for anything suspicious. I entered the Nairobi Hilton where every person entering the hotel has to go through a metal detector. Security in the city is very tight no matter where you go.

On my way to my first meeting in the slum area of Mathare I see short busses, brightly painted with slogans or portraits and people packed into them like sardines. At one point I see a short bus with TuPac on the side…. Really???? That is so not right…. I see many with Bob Marley… That’s much better. Some of then scream “I love Jesus”, some of them say “player”….. I can’t help but giggle.

I meet with Steve from Dignitas Project at his church, and a little children’s choir is singing in Swahili. A little boy goes next and could have rivaled James Brown. I am taken to the roof and given a high level overview of the area. Each of the “blocks” are named after different things or places. The one to the left of the church down the dirt path is called “Vietnam”. The houses are made of metal sheets and are the no bigger than 15 feet by 15 feet, no electricity, no running water, and no facilities. I saw one government-run bathroom facility catering to blocks and blocks of these metal houses. The people have different sites that have hoses to fill water containers for all of their needs. The smell of raw sewage is almost overwhelming.

I am introduced to a beautiful woman named Emma who is HIV positive and takes care of patients who are bed ridden. She takes me to a few clients of hers who have been doing very well. A few things I keep hearing is that there is a stigma if people find out you're HIV positive, and many are abandoned by their family. The other thing is that even if a patient is blessed enough to obtain the antiviral medicines, they don’t always have food to take them with so they don’t take them. This also happens with TB meds. The problem with this is if you stop taking the TB meds you build up a tolerance and have to start a whole new regimen.

My driver Gibrani took me on a tour of the city. He took me to the site where the US Embassy used to be until the al-Qaida bombing in 1998. I saw a sculpture of twisted metal that was pieces from the building that collapsed. It was starting to make sense why the security was so tight all around the city. Next we went to the Kenya National Archives. This housed really beautiful art from all over Africa. Our final stop was Freedom Park. This is where the people celebrated their freedom. It kind of reminds me of Golden Gate Park or the Park in the middle of Buenos Aries. Big lake in the middle, lots of grass and an open amphitheater. They had a very excited crusade of some kind going on. I was dropped off at my hotel and was so tired I fell asleep by 8.

Friday, April 9, 2010

BBQ Durban Style (BraaiVleis)

As my big send off Pastor Bobby’s family got together and held a BBQ for me at their house. It’s kind of strange to feel so at home with people you have only known a week but this family is amazing…. I am blessed to know them and love them for loving me.

The next day Pastor Bobby and Ashley took me to the airport and it was a sad good by for now. Pastor Bobby refers to himself as my South African Durban Father… go figure I have a beautiful Caucasian family and fantastic beautiful friends that I consider family in the US and an Indian family in South Africa.

Again I must stress the importance of what Pastor Bobby and his family have sacrificed for the betterment of people that are underserved. He is so well respected as a leader in the community. He is truly a champion and a beautiful person that embodies the love of Christ. The love that the family showed a stranger is so humbling (I know you’re tired of this word but I have no other way to express how I’m am feeling)

Hanging with the kiddies and kittys….

On Friday we drove an hour plus out of Durban to Entembeni Community Centre (Pietermaritzburg) with Pastor Albert Chetty. The children are on their spring break because the school calendar has been moved around due to the FIFA world cup. Pastor Chetty runs a children’s program and had 46 kiddies attended this session. We ran a TeachAIDS session. The children ranged in ages from 5-16. The children had many comments and questions about what they thought about the video. Some said they learned many things. Some said they just liked it. All in all I felt it was a good session and the feedback was good. Pastor Chetty gave me a tour of the grounds.
After the session we went to find the wild animals. Ok, maybe they weren’t totally wild but they were in a nature reserve. We saw zebras hugging, and something that looked like a gazelle but had another name in Africana. The piece de resistance of the day….. We got to view 15 lions in their natural habitat… ok maybe they were in an enclosed area that was just for them. It was so hot that day most of them were napping and just cuddling together. We were instructed NOT to open the windows and stop the car…. Year right…. I got my nerdy camera out dropped the window and starting rapid firing. I might have done some meowing but I figure “when in Rome”. It was so fun!

Thursday, April 8, 2010

Bunny Chow…. No I didn’t eat grass or the Easter bunny….

I usually wouldn’t include someone else’s writing in my blog but Pastor Bobby explained the delicious world of Bunny Chow so why rewrite it?

DURBAN’S FAVOURITE LOCAL INDIAN DISH

The word Bunny Chow is derived from two words - Bunny (relating to Bania or Gujarati speaking people) and Chow (South African Slang for Food).

Bunny chow is a slang term for an Indian South African fast food consisting of bread made of I/4 loaf or ½ loaf or a full loaf of bread with the inside scooped out, and filled with curry.

Durban is noted for its Bunny Chow.

The Bunny Chow (or Bunny) should always be eaten with the fingers (No fork and knife) starting with the lump of bread, or virgin, on top.

Bunny Chow was created in Durban, during the 1940s, where the largest population of Indians in the world outside of India lives.

I had my first Bunny Chow on Friday 9th April 2010 in Durban.”


Training the trainers at Chatsworth Hospice….

Pastor Bobby and I ran a session at the Chatsworth hospice for health care providers. We had over 40 attendees. They were engaged and definitely saw value in how this can help their community. This session was very interactive. After the question and answer session Pastor Bobby held drug awareness session with the group. Ashley and I took pictures around the property and we ran some errands, by that I mean we snuck out and had lunch. hehehe

Chatsworth, Durban Child welfare….

Pastor Bobby works closely with this group to better the lives of children in the community; he introduced me to the director and other key people in the organization. They were so welcoming and loving. We were able to introduced the TeachAIDS CD and they will be using in their school outreach program.

After this we were taken to an informal settlement (Crossmoor). Picture this, less than an acre of metal shacks no bigger than 8 feet by 8 feet with no electricity, no running water and people that can’t get work due to many reasons. One reason is that they have no form of identification. Many of the parents have died from HIV, leaving the children with no birth certificate and starting the domino effect…

Again this hits close to home. As I was left at a police station in Daegu City, South Korea circa 1974 (yes I just gave my age away…. I wear SPF 100 and try to take care of myself and have decent genes; I have decided I’m going to age gracefully…. Maybe botox will be my bff later but for now I don’t care about age) as an infant with no birth certificate and no hope for a future without the amazing support of the Willbanks family. These beautiful people are my family. I could have easily been very much like these people that I am meeting on my journey. I don’t consider Dr. Chuck Barry, Doris, Michael, Lara, Josh, Zach, Atha (aka LADY), Dorothy, George and Grandpa Al, Phyllis, Sherman, Steven, Michelle as adopted parents or foster family. They are my family and I can’t explain the love that I have for them. My heart cannot explain the gratitude for them and their having to deal with my long-time-ago teenage angst. (Oh, I was a handful and a BIG pain in the backside. I gave my parents all the grey hair they have. I know you’re shocked. Yet they did and still show me what unconditional love is).

With no birth certificate these fok in Crossmoor have no way to prove who they are, no possibilities of medical care and very little food. Some of the blessed or lucky people who do have identification can’t afford the bus fare to go to the clinic to get tested for HIV and start the proper regimen of antiviral medications. As in other countries, if they do obtain the antiviral they might or might not take them because they do not have food to take with the medicines. The smell of raw sewage is pungent. One of the other major issues is that the children get very sick because of the raw sewage spill off from where the children play in the dirt. There is one outhouse that caters to this area. I spoke to the group with an angel of a translator Colleen, who works in the area with Chatsworth Children’s welfare in there satellite metal shack. Pastor Bobby is going to help them obtain birth certificates; this is a long process but that is the kind of amazing person Pastor Bobby is. Pastor Bobby is also helping them with other issues they have. He is truly an advocate for the underserved. We were taken on a tour of the informal settlement, women and children came up to me, hugged me and kissed me and held on so tight I wanted to start crying. They just wanted to say thank you.

I don’t feel like I was able to do much but I was able to listen, love them and hopefully give these people a voice that they would not usually have. Pastor Bobby is the grassroots person who will make a difference in the lives of these wonderful people. I am realizing that the grassroots organizations are the major difference. No matter how many Americans come to see the situations and in some way or another throw money at the situation, it is these people that make the true difference. Again it’s very humbling… that seems to be the theme of this pilgrimage or whatever you want to call my year of volunteer service.

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

Some are left at the hospital… some are left in a paper bag on the side of the road….

Pastor Bobby had arranged for the three of us to go visit another Pastor friend of his who runs a home for abandoned children…. Gulp… can we say close to home? We met with the pastor and his wife. They are both retired but run a church and abandoned children’s home on the same property. This house is not funded by any government programs; they operate on private donations.

The pastor showed us where the children live, and we all went into the play room. One by one the children came up and the pastor told us their story. They were all super-cute but one little one was just such a cutie-patooty. He was born premature with HIV and was left at the hospital. He has grown and is healthy, all things considered. One of the girls was wrapped up in a paper bag and left on the side of the road when she was only a few weeks old…. She doesn’t speak but is just a love bug full of hugs and smiles. As we sat and talked to the pastor and his wife, a few of the children who were supposed to be napping poked their little heads out…. It was so cute! Yes, it actually crossed my mind about the possibilities of adopting one or two…but don’t worry, I didn’t. I’m not trying to get in touch with my inner Madonna.

Flow Riding…. Durban style….

Flow Riding…. Durban style….
Pastor Bobby says “all work and no play make’s Bethany a dull girl”. They took me to the biggest mall in the southern hemisphere called Gateway. It has an indoor rock climbing wall that would make REI jealous, so many stores and restaurants but the most fun was flow riding. This is a man made wave that is super fun. This was my first time. It’s a mix of surfing, snowboarding, and skating and is harder than it looks. I had a blast. I took a few wipeouts and got a few bruises but it was so worth it. Ashley and I did some “flow dancing”. So funny!

Tuesday, April 6, 2010

AA Durban style…

Pastor Bobby, Ashley and I went to meet with a group that I can’t name because of confidentially reasons. This was a rehabilitation center for women that struggle with alcoholism. They seemed really young to me, maybe everyone looks young to me… have I become one of “those” people that calls everyone “kids”. Haha. At least I’m Asian so people think I’m younger than I am… bless them! One was from Johannesburg and the other two were from Durban. We went through a TeachAIDS session and one of the women was very interested. The other two were kind of interested but I got the feeling they would have rather been somewhere else. I asked them if they learned anything. They nodded but not much reaction except for the one girl. I asked the girls if they knew their status. Not surprisingly, two of them did not and the one who showed interest said she gets tested twice a year. We discussed that it is ok to love yourself and your body… it’s the only one we have.

Sunday, April 4, 2010

Swimming with the sharks.. and meeting some cool people along the way

So after an emotional week I decide that I would go Great White Shark cage diving. I get up a few minutes before 5:00am - the shuttle is to pick me up at 5:50am and want to be ready. Two cups of coffee later I’m waiting in front of my hotel for the short bus to pick me up for my adventure. I wait and wait. I call the company and they tell me the driver is running late. (I found out later that they forgot me and actually turned the van around to pick me up). Gansbaai Bay is two hours from Cape Town. My ipod and I take a little nap before we get there. It is so foggy and cold. After breakfast, debriefing etc. we are taken to the boat… this isn’t just any boat…. It’s been around the world in 70 days….fancy. Another hour of freezing and we arrive at Shark’s Alley. They will allow 6 people at a time in the cage. I meet lots of college kids from Semester at Sea, attending universities all over the US. I make a few new friends on the cold ride to the Alley.

Melissa and Brian are my new bff's from Chicago and Seattle. They are working in a rural clinic two hours from Durban. Melissa is in medical school and is doing a year of research. Brian is a physician and doing part of his residency here. He will be going to Boston after this… what a change of pace… Seattle to Sub-Sahara Africa to Harvard….. We wait for the sharks to come and play… The dive master takes an AHI head (so smelly) and uses this as bait… the ahi head is bigger than my head and they also use a bag of squishy brown stuff. Melissa asks what it is: shark liver. Blach. Finally the sharks come to investigate. We hop into the cage with specific instructions not to put any fingers or toes outside the cage. It's pretty cool seeing the feared great white shark just a foot or so away. The sun comes out and it turns into a fantastic day!

Lots of SUGARS in Durban, but no PEEPS....

Easter Sunday in Durban I was invited to Pastor Bobby's house for a buffet of different curry dishes. Pastor Bobby had told his family I love spicy food so they were on the hunt to make a curry that I found spicy. Bobby’s daughter made kabob in red curry and it was spicy! Yum. Priscilla made a flat hand-made bread. Kind of like a tortilla. Yum yum yum! I tried mutten and lots of other new foods.
After dinner Pastor Bobby, Priscilla, Ashley, Pastor Chris and I went to a local rehab center. We met 22 young men who were, for the most part, SUGARS addicts. I had no idea what SUGARS was… SUGARS is the resin from heroine and rat poisoning. It’s cooked and smoked. Pastor Bobby had shown me a Dateline type show that looks at the SUGARS problem especially in the Indian community. Pastor Bobby spoke to the young men and introduced me and had me tell my story of adoption and how I got to where I am today. The guys seemed to be comfortable that I was here to give them resources, not be the great “yellow” hope. I asked the guys what it was like to be high on SUGARS. They said the first time you get high it’s euphoric. The rest of the time you spend trying to get that same high with no avail and really bad withdrawal symptoms. One of the guys said it would be similar to chasing the heroine dragon. One hit of SUGARS is 15 Rand. That’s about $2.00. These guys started out partaking socially but it soon tured into steeling or begging for the money to get the next hit.

I ran two different programs with this group during my stay in Durban. One day we ran a TeachAIDS session and a few days later I ran a Seeds of Empowerment Storytelling Workshop. The guys' feedback was positive on both sessions. I hope and pray that they succeed in the rehabilitation.

One of the many things that I am amazed by with Pastor Bobby is that he has a way of speaking TO the people not AT the people. The groups he speaks to are very receptive and open to what he has to say. He is very respected in the community and seen as a positive leader and role model.

Saturday, April 3, 2010

Deeply honored… a very humbling experience and a lot of unexpected tears….

Thursday I went with Lindikaya Ntshinga, Executive director, Zazi Foundation to a hospital in one of the townships. At Guguletu Health Clinic, we met with the director Ntombomzi Mabusela. She is a very passionate woman about health care and education for her community.

Lindikaya had pre-arranged a TeachAIDS session for the patients. 30+ people attended this session. Learning from my last session I had picked up speakers for my net book, but unfortunately they didn’t help much. Lindikaya asked me to talk through the CD and explain the animations. I started and all I saw was blank looks. It was as if Lindikaya and I had been working together for years…. He jumped in and started talking through the animations in their dialect. I was able to document the session via video and still photography. We had reminded ourselves to pick up some sweets for the attendees and totally ran out of time. During the question and answer session I ran outside the heavily guarded gates to the women I remembered selling food items when we came in. I think I bought almost all they had. I was able to buy cold juices and sweet cakes. One woman approached me and said “dear little girl you need to hold onto your purse (I only had my wallet). The boys like to be mischievous.” It was very sweet. I ran back in with my shoes clicking on the hospital hallway with all the treats. Lindikaya had a full page of questions and thoughts about the session from the participants. I went to interview Ntombomzi Mabusela. What an angel.

We started passing out the juices and sweet cakes. The people were very appreciative. One woman said something very sweet to me that I told myself I would ask Lindikaya later about. We wrapped up the session and the director walked us around the hospital so I could take pictures.

After the session we were delighted with the results. As we were being driven to the next location I saw the woman who told me to hold onto my purse walking down the street, I stuck my head out of the car and waved. She looked up at me and stated waving and sending kisses! Lindikaya took me to the place to eat in Guguletu called Mzolis. This is an outdoor restaurant place of all kinds of BBQ meat and socializing. We ended up spending the afternoon with a few of his friends that he told me later were very high powered in the Parliament. Who knew? I was spending time with the big fancy government guys. I almost died. When we were sitting at the table a car drove by and one of the guys said, “The cougars are on the prowl”. I had no idea that “cougars” were worldwide! I found this so funny I had to text a few of my friends from home and they got a laugh out of it to. (FYI – a cougar is also known as an urban cougar, older woman dating younger men. Think Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher) Due to the fact that I had given up red meat for lent Lindikaya ordered us chicken. You will never guess what I ate…. Chicken wings…. For those of you who know me well, I NEVER eat chicken wings. I had a few and they were really good. This will not become a habit. I’ll continue eating my grilled skinless, boneless, chicken breast. People keep asking me what I think about Cape Town. I tell them I am in LOVE with this town and the people and wonder how I can stay longer. I get the same answer every time: “You should find a nice South African man and you can stay; he will give your parents a dowry for you”. It cracks me up that this is the usual response to a woman wanting to stay in Cape Town.

On the way to take me back to the hotel Lindikaya told me that all the people who attended the session this afternoon were HIV positive. He didn’t know if I was going to be bothered by this. I told him I wasn’t at all. I asked him what the lady said to me. He explained it to me and I was so touched I started crying in the car…. This is what I had asked him, and this is his response in an email he sent to Piya about our day:

“ I hope this find you well. I hope that what I type reflects the excitement and joy I am feeling at the moment. I planned a TeachAids workshop at one of the hospitals in the township. This was attended by a group of 30 HIV/AIDS women and children. It was one of the best experiences of my life, it’s amazing how with such limited resources we can be able to make an impact on the lives of others.

The women were particularly fond of Bethany as I am. Her passion and her drive reflects on how she takes what we do seriously and understands its impact on others. I don’t know how to explain this in English but I will try. At the end of the session one of the women came up to her and said "Enkosi Kakhulu Mamma". This is rare form of thanksgiving reserved for great women in society. I was quite moved and comforted by that. It showed that the people understand the sacrifices we make in order impact their lives positively”.

It still brings me to tears… I have had a few women during my trip this far say to me "Enkosi Kakhulu Mamma" I have smiled and have been gracious but did not know what an honor this truly was…. It took me a few days to wrap my hands around this day and write about it. This is one of the days that I will remember for the rest of my life.

Durban…. Bollywood style!!!!

I spent a wonderful week in Durban… Fantastic people, food, weather, beach… Could you ask for more? Why yes you can… You could ask for a local contact named Pastor Bobby Freddy of HIV Education and Life (HELP) in Chatsworth. He is an incredible super human who treated me like family the minute I got off the plane. He and his other pastor friend took me to his house to meet his family. I was welcomed with open arms and big hugs. This was very comforting because I had been having some internal conflict about what I’m doing on this trip and am I achieving anything? Pastor Bobby has a warm family. His wife Priscilla is a mother to all, his two daughters are darling, two sons are great, baby granddaughter is beautiful smiley, and there is a cute little puppy named Patches.

I have to give props to Pastor Bobby's son Ashley for making this week so fun! Ashley is currently waiting for his work visa and will be running the soon to be “Ferrari World” in Abu Dhabi. He spent the last three years in Singapore, and before that was the big fancy manager at the world’s first man-made Wave Park for flow riding at the Gateway Mall (biggest mall in the southern hemisphere). He was such a good sport, carting his father and me to meetings all over Durban. Poor guy had to get up at the crack of dawn to sit in traffic to get me at the hotel then schlep the big speaker and amplifier so the TeachAIDS sound would work through my Netbook. We're now bff’s. Maybe I’ll go see him when Ferrari World opens and channel my inner Ricky Bobby. Ashley is one cool cat.

Pastor Bobby and Ashley took me to the largest harikrishna temple in the southern hemisphere. You can see the temple from far away. I know you’re shocked but it had a ton of bling on it.

Next we went to the Bangladesh open market. I had just learned that Durban and the province it is in has the second largest Indian population outside of India. Pastor Bobby had read my past blog and noticed that I took a picture of a woman de-feathering a chicken. He wanted to show me Durban style feather removal….. The irony is I can watch a triple bypass open heart surgery… chest plate sawed open and pried apart, heart stopped and put on bypass, vein harvesting, cauterization etc…without flinching, but this scene of chickens in cages, the wind blowing up all kinds of bad smells was almost too much for me. They had a machine that kind of looked like a bread slicer, the round blades turn and go super fast and pull all the feathers off…… blach… I almost threw up…. Oh the smells…. After Bobby got pictures of this, we walked through the open market. WOW! Super fresh veggies and tons of yummy looking hot peppers! Pastor Bobby bought me a samosa. Yum! Potato, because I still had one day of lent left until red meat heaven. I had a feeling this week would embody my Indian curry boot camp. YUM YUM YUM! A long time ago I thought I didn’t like curry. Coconut curry veggies were my nightmare when I worked at PF Changs. In Fiji on a surf trek, I discovered that I do like curry. Maybe there was something in the curry I had before that I was not fond of. You would think that with my obsession with spicy food I would be the queen of spicy brieanne…. I have narrowed it down to I like coconut and I like curry but not together.

Thursday, April 1, 2010

Rehab... not Vegas style, Wallacedene Township, and how to remove feathers from a chicken

Yesterday was the most difficult day I have encountered on my trip thus far. I went with the angels from the YMCA to a drug rehabilitation program for youth. They go every Wednesday to work with these children. Four medical students took part in this as part of their rotations. This center is located only about 30 minutes from Cape Town city center. It's the only center that has a special place for the teens. Across the road is the adult center. The government is thinking about closing this facility, leaving no options for the young people but to fall farther into the CRYSTAL METH trap and eventually end up as an adult at the center, jail or dead*. (*this is my own speculation)

Usually the sessions are co-ed. This session they had 18 girls, ages 13-17. A few of the girls were so tiny, I wanted to scoop them up and put them in my pocket. The girls were all beautifully different shades of brown with different texture of hair and unique features, but all of them had a had a heavy sadness in their eyes.

The day started with introductions and where the girls were from. We played a few name association games and the girls were starting to warm up to the group. After a few more activities the YMCA leaders helped the girls build boundaries and rules for their five week stay. The next activity brought me to tears. All of the YMCA leaders got into a circle and told the girls they were bringing in a blanket (imaginary blanket) and the girls could throw their problems and what they don't want to be like in the blanket and when they were done they would take the blanket away along with what the girls put into the blanket. They could say it out loud or to themselves. A few girls slowly "tossed" a few things in the blanket. Some of the staff and med students tossed in their worries too. As the activity progressed, more and more of the girls got involved. One of the girls who seemed hard and closed off started crying. As the activity ended the leaders took the blanket out of the room, the leaders and the girls stood in a circle, held hands and prayed. After this moment I have no idea what compelled me but I went to the little girl who was crying and gave her a big bear hug and told her that she was going to do good things, she was beautiful and special. I hugged, she held on tighter. I held it together on the outside for this little one but inside I was a big hot mess. My heart was breaking for each of these girls and what they are up against.

Next was lunch. I was allowed to walk around the property and take pictures. Because of confidentiality I can't show any of the girls or the rehab name.

After lunch I ran my first TeachAIDS session. With a few minor technical difficulties (I forgot one of the cords to the projector - luckily the center had one but the sound was not loud enough. I will be buying speakers today) the session went well. The YMCA staff asked me to share my story with the girls. I shared with them about how I went from being abandoned to where I am today. We watched the TeachAIDS CD, and I had a question and answer session. I asked the girls... Did you like it? Did you learn anything new? What do you think? and a few other questions. The girls raised their hands to answer my questions.

These were some of their answers:
"Yes I liked the video, I learned a lot"
"I learned you can not get AIDS from touching some one"
"I did not know that a baby can get HIV from the mothers milk"
"I learned that it does not matter where you're from - anyone can get HIV"
"I did not know there was no cure for HIV"
"I learned that you should never share needles; you can get HIV from this"

This opened up to an open forum. Some of the YMCA leaders asked the girls if they knew their HIV status. Most didn't know. We discussed abstinence and condom use, how many of the girls have been sexually active, that it's OK to say NO. I ended the session with my own version of a pep talk for the girls. I shared with them that they are all very special and will be able to achieve anything they want to if they put their mind to it. They can and should be good to themselves because they are worth it. They are all beautiful and unique. They CAN be good to their bodies and good to themselves. They deserve to be loved and to respect themselves. After I got off my soap box the girls asked if I was coming next week. I sadly had to tell them I would be in another part of their country but would be thinking about them. One by one the girls came up to each of the YMCA leaders and myself and gave us big hugs and kisses. I kept reminding them that they can do good things.

So what I struggled with and still am is after we left I learned that when these girls get done with the rehab session, the likelihood of them succeeding and not coming back is slim. These girls may or may not have parents who are alive. Most of them have been physically, mentally and/or sexually abused and live below poverty level.... where do you go with this?

All 8 of us piled into the YMCA van so I could see a local Township. We went to Wallacedence Township. All the little "homes" are row after row in this area. There is no plumbing. About every block there is a "Slum Dog Millionaire" style outhouse. A few stores are in the "MAERSK" shipping containers, hair salon included.

The block's outhouse

One of the Chateau de Wallacedene

Could I be more Asian??? I'm in a van rolling through the township with my camera at the window on rapid fire mode.....I'm embracing my roots...

On the last block we saw a woman burning the feathers off chickens in a big pot of fire.... the price was 50 Rand.. this is about $7.14 a chicken. Have a mentioned that the number of Kentucky Fried Chicken's way out number McDonald's in Cape Town? I was surprised, too ... and no, I haven't been to either.